Tuesday, 19 July 2011

Dog People

I like dogs a normal amount. I have never owned one, but can see their appeal. From this stance, I find observing “dog people” highly amusing. Sometimes, a bit weird. My best dog/owner-related incident, to date, occurred recently during a journey up to Leeds. It begun with a slightly “kooky” looking man walking into the waiting room at Peterborough. He was one of the people that seems to make up for the limitations of his wordless dog friend by speaking to everyone else. When an old woman smiled nervously at the dog, the man said: “Don’t worry she won’t bite” and laughed as if the idea of this wolf-like creature biting anyone was ludicrous. He then proceeded to feed the dog biscuits and pineapple from a lunch box in a ‘one for you, one for me’ type way. I found this absurd, quite funny and alarmingly reminiscent of Lolita. The same old woman who was trying to avoid getting mauled politely asked its (or “her”) name. “Boudicca… I’m big on archaeology”. What? Boudicca the dog, after Boudicca the Queen of the Iceni? He continued to say equally ridiculous things until I had to go and get my train. I sat down and began texting my friend about what I had just witnessed, and who trots on to the train and sits but two seats in front… Boudicca and Mr. Boudicca. As if the scene earlier hadn’t been enough, he said: “Lie down baby.” If it would be inappropriate to say to a girlfriend in public, don’t say it to a dog. That should be a litmus test.